Oh, and I’d like to officially tell the folks at McDonald’s, you know what? You guys don’t have to advertise as much as you do.
Okay, we get it. Yes, you’re the folks who sell hamburgers. Thank you very much. We understand completely. There’s no need for the incessant 24-hour .. It’s just insane. They don’t have to advertise this much.
I mean, I don’t know why they do that, you know? It’s not like when I wake up .. If I don’t see an ad for McDonald’s, I’m not confused, you know? I’m not sittin’ there going, “HEY, did McDonald’s go out of business?
They don’t have to do it. All they have to do is, like, stop one day, like, every four months. You know, that’s it. Their sales aren’t gonna go down. They’ll save millions of dollars, and then maybe they can put that money back into the system, you know?
Maybe, uh, you know, pay their minimum wage help an extra buck an hour. How about that, you know? Yeah, spread the wealth. That way, the next time I go into McDonald’s, I don’t have to deal with some understandably pissed-off 19-year-old kid who’s making 10 an hour TO STAND OVER A fucking 900-Degree frialater all day, you know, sitting there going, “can somebody explain to me again why I shouldn’t be selling drugs?
— David Cross